Would you notice?

What would actually happen

if I stopped talking?

If one day I went quiet?

If you stopped hearing my voice,

my laugh?,

my awkward jokes?

Would you even notice?

Would you even be bothered?

What would happen

if I was no longer there?

If my presence was no longer felt,

my love,

my warmth?

Would you even care?

Or would you move on

like the rest of the world?

I don’t think so.

I wish you would notice,

but it’s fine.

It is, really.

I always say it’s fine

because it will be

if I pretend enough.

Because I know you wouldn’t even notice anything anymore.

Because you never did.

Even as much as I wish you would.

And that’s the hardest part, isn’t it?

The realization that my absence might not even register,

that the space I thought I once occupied

could be filled so seamlessly.

But yours could never be filled,

just closed off,

like a room in an empty house,

waiting to be opened

because you’re the only one who has the key.

Because I thought I held a position in your life.

I thought I earned a position,

just like you earned yours in mine.

But you were a visitor.

It’s a quiet kind of heartbreak,

a silent scream into the void.

But I’ll keep pretending,

because what else is there to do?

So...

would you notice?

I'm on my period 🙂…